I’m about to tell you something you already know.
You’re getting in your own way.
In fact, I can almost guarantee that the number one thing that’s holding you back from whatever you want more of in life, is you.
And here’s the kicker.
Blaming yourself doesn’t help a bit. In fact, it makes it worse. Counterintuitive, I know. Why wouldn’t you blame yourself for something that’s your fault?
It’s a simple answer really. You have no idea HOW to get out of your own way. If you did, you would.
It ubiquitous too.
Every person I’ve ever worked with, including me, gets in their own way every time they’re blocked or stuck.
But you already knew that. So, what do you do about it?
First, you’ve got to admit to what you really want and why you want it. Trust me, you probably haven’t.
For example: Take that new job (or biz) you want. You’re fully aware that you want to do work that feels meaningful, to make a difference and to earn good money doing it. But I promise you there’s more underneath – a feeling state that’s driving the whole thing.
Relevant
Proud
Respected
Seen
Understood
Admired
Loved
These are just a few of the drivers beneath our goals. Feeling states like these sit at the heart of why you do what you do.
(And why you don’t do what you don’t.) To fail at a goal is painful, but to fail at being relevant, respected, loved… is terrifying.
That’s ok.
Because once you know what really drives you, you’ll be able to find places in your life where you already have it.
Don’t get me wrong, this can be challenging.
If your driver is to be relevant and you’re feeling particularly irrelevant or if you want to be loved but have always felt unloved, you may struggle to find evidence that feels real.
Keep digging.
I’ve done this exercise with literally hundreds of people, and they ALWAYS find real evidence that the feeling state they seek exists or has existed already in their life.
This creates an entirely new foundation for you. You’re crystal clear about what you really want and why you want it, and you know that it’s possible for you to have it.
From here, go back and look at your original goal. If it still feels relevant, it’s time to go for it.
Answer these two questions to help you stay out of your way and keep moving forward.
“What do I risk if I go all-in on this goal?”
“What do I risk if I don’t?”
Struggling with how to make this work for you? Reach out (just hit reply) – I’m here to help.
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